Salsa men get a bad rap. “Be warned! ” they say. “They are all cheaters, they are all womanisers and they are all arrogant as hell” is what you often hear behind the scenes at your local Salsa club. But is this really true and should you date a Salsero or avoid them? As they say, there are always two sides to every story and today we are going to take a good look. What are the great things about dating a Salsero, and what are the bad?
THE GREAT STUFF
A Salsero is already active and fit
He’s on his feet all night, he’s moving, he’s sweating and he is keeping that body in tip top shape. He can’t really be a Salsero and a couch potato, can he? What could be sexier and more appealing in a partner than that?
A Salsero doesn’t let British stereotypes stop him
As a British man, it takes guts to learn to dance Salsa. Sadly there are people who (wrongly) view dancing as somehow effeminate and feel threatened by the mere mention of men dancing Salsa. What a shame- nothing could be further from the truth. It takes a man comfortable in his own skin and in his own sexuality to bust the stereotypes, learn to dance Salsa and ignore the teasing of work colleagues and well-meaning-but-ignorant friends.
A Salsero is open-minded, cultured and maybe a little adventurous too
One of the loveliest things about Salsa is the diverse, multi-cultural and open-minded people that it attracts. A man that dances is likely to be all of these things and probably has a lot more special talents of his own just waiting to be revealed.
A Salsero is (or at least should be) pretty good in bed…
Watch the object of your desires for a second. Tell me what you’re thinking (and keep it clean please!) A man who dances well has rhythm- it’s impossible to dance without it. Team that with fitness and great body movement and you have….a pretty good chance of success en la cama 😉
Shared interests are awesome
You already have something in common and that’s your love for Salsa. What better way to start? You can go out for a date-night and social night out with friends at the same time. You can indulge in your hobby without guilt. You’ll be able to retain a little of your freedom. You’ll be able to talk about it afterwards and finally have someone that understands what the hell you are talking about and also ‘gets it’. Sounds pretty good to me.
Salsa is a chemistry test
Salsa brings people together and instantly thrusts you into close contact. When you dance, you can’t help but notice whether you have chemistry or not. There’s no need for guesswork here.
THE BAD STUFF
Watch out for the ego
For some silly reason, we expect women to be able to dance easily and for men to find it a little trickier. Rightly or wrongly. That means that when a man can dance well, it ‘s viewed as a very special thing and unfortunately has a tendency to go a little to his head. After all, he suddenly has a great skill that makes him a very popular person. Who wouldn’t feel their ego increase in size just a little? It’s when it gets a little out of control that you are asking for trouble. Be warned!
Chance to cheat?
Salsa is a highly social sport and you end up mixing with lot of new people, you have physical contact with lots of people and you get to know lots of people too. This in itself is nothing short of fantastic. However the problem arises when you are of a slightly less-than-loyal disposition and you end up feeling that Salsa is the ultimate playground for you….
Jealous? Then look away
Can you handle all of that attention on your partner? And more importantly are you the jealous type? This is really a place where your level of trust and issues with jealousy get tested. Is your partner trustworthy? Do you have a reason to be jealous? Remember, Salsa is a partner dance and your partner will be dancing with other members of the opposite sex. You might just have to get over it.
There’s no escape
I’ve lost count of the times that a friend of mine broke up with a Salsero boyfriend and we spent our usual night out not dancing but plotting her ex’s movements, who her ex was talking to, or she would be avoiding her ex. It’s almost impossible in a social scene with a limited number of people. You can’t help but cross paths. Can you handle that if it happens?
Salsa chemistry does not necessarily translate to real-life
You had the most amazing dance with the most amazing person. The chemistry was intense- it left you kind of breathless. But does that mean you’ve found your soulmate? Not necessarily I’m afraid. Salsa chemistry is salsa chemistry and doesn’t necessarily translate to everyday life. Sad but true. …Salseros (like anyone else) can be dull.
Salsa is not the real world
Salsa does funny things to people. It has the wonderful theraputic effect of making you forget your job, your troubles or anything else that bothers you and you are able to experience the moment. That also means that things you experience within Salsa do not necessarily translate to everyday life either. And I’m not just talking about chemistry either. There are all kinds of ideas that come to you in the middle of the night and that seem like a great idea at the time but just don’t work in the morning…
Everyone is a gossip
Salsa is a bit of a closed scene, a bit like a small town. It’s full of lots of people you love and see a lot and also full of those you’d rather not see at all. Everyone knows everyone else’s business and they will happily share all the gossip about who is dating who, who used to date who and who has been seen leaving the club with Person X. Does that bother you?
As you now know, Salsa men have a bad reputation, but as you can see there are also some great advantages to dating someone from the Salsa scene. They’re fit, open-minded, and of course have the same interests as you. They’re likely to be adventurous, and if British, no scared of what people think. However, as you’ve seen above, there are also a few things to watch out for when it comes to dating in the Salsa scene.
But don’t believe all of the hype. Salsa men aren’t all as bad as they’re made out to be. Give them a chance and you might meet the love of your life.
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What do you think of dating within the Salsa scene? Is it lovers’ paradise or a hell best avoided? Share it all in the comments below.
Image © Anton Kudris